Sorry...

ohmygosh...

i told our oncologist's PA earlier, they have to let joe out so i can take him home just to get him well.

we went from the bloody diarrhea, which they got control of pretty quick... got him down to the 5th floor, and he was feeling perky, and we were hopeful for a short stay.

then he started projectile vomiting stomach bile. that went on for most of a day, then they sent him down for a CT... supposedly showed a blockage in the small intestine... (i say supposedly, as the surgeon said he never thought blockage, but more infection akin to what they found in joe's colon... but the oncologist apparently didn't completely agree, tho he never really said exactly what he thought HE saw. the GI doc was saying blockage, but he was basing his findings on what the surgeon supposedly saw, which in the records say "blockage, per dr. w", but dr. w said no blockage... more like inflammation... ?!?!?) that led to him getting a NG tube through his nose into his stomach for a couple days... pumping the bile out to relieve pressure in his stomach so the "whatever" would hopefully clear. added a 2nd antibiotic...

after another day and a 1/2 (?), nobody had done anything toward trying to figure out what was going on down below, so the surgeon finally ordered an xray... and made the executive decision to pull the tube. everything held... no more vomiting... joe was able to start eating... still some loose, watery stools, but no more bleeding...

we were JUST thinking we'd get turned loose today... and all of the on call docs were in agreement... and last night they came in and said that joe's acid content was off... so they started him on a drip of basically baking soda water... and a couple of tabs that are basically the same (sodium bicarbonate)... that seemed to start working really quickly... and so still hoping... maybe tomorrow?

then this morning, joe was running a bit of a fever... 101 something... he's not been peeing a whole lot, so they draw labs... get a urine sample... maybe a kidney or bladder issue... so they change one of the antibiotics for another... and on we go.

i swear, being in the hospital is nowhere to be if you're sick or well. on top of everything else, joe's fighting a bedsore, the air in here is so dry, my sinuses are dried out... his sinuses are dried out... my nerves are shot...

there is nowhere to go, nothing to do here... we get out and do a few laps a day, but still. otherwise, just basically stuck in this little room. i COULD go home... maybe should go home, but folks come in and talk to joe while he's napping, while i'm out getting lunch, or a drink... and he doesn't remember who, or what was said... i don't not want to know what's going on. having enough trouble getting the drs. to coordinate...

i don't know what we're going to do, either, if he doesn't get out of here soon... he's going to have to have a few days at home to rest and regain himself from this week and 1/2 hospital stay. he's only covered for a few more days of time off (the guys at work have all donated PTO to joe... covering nearly 2 weeks time). his CPS boss said he could go on short term disability... but that's just 65% of his pay. we couldn't live on that for very long. well, more honestly, we just couldn't live on it period. we're running out of money before month already. i'm trying really hard to not feel bitter toward our friend, joe's bigger boss, for all this boeing BS. if they'd have hired joe on, and he was making what he should be, then it might be doable, but not at the measly $16 an hour he's getting now. that whole pay thing has just become a real sore subject with me. a year and 1/2 ago, the company joe works for wheedled out of giving him the raise that he'd been told he was going to get. then tony and eric have been dangling the vought/boeing job thing in front of joe's nose like a carrot, and have yet to come through for him. they could have even pushed the issue on joe's raise, but didn't. we're on a sinking ship, and there is just no sign of a life boat.

i know God is in control... and that we have to live with whatever His will is for us in all of this... but i've been here before, and it's no more pleasant the 2nd time around. it's really hard to watch your husband basically slipping away in front of your very eyes. not good, not good at all. just praying that God will give me grace and understanding... i'm running in short supply right now.